What Makes a Good Coach?
There are lots of types of coaches; probably as many types as there are personalities in people. Often what I see is those that are very successful at what they do are not good coaches. In sports I see this at the proffesional level, college level, and even at the youth level.
I have 6 boys and the four oldest have and do all compete competively on some level and at some sport, the younger two will.
For a person to be incredibly good at something they have to be driven - very driven. We might say that drive comes from a need to succeed or win. But I think that is too easy. Often driven people are driven in different ways towards the same goal and each can be very successful being driven in different ways.
What I see with very driven people that have been very successful when they go to coach is they try to motivate everyone in the same way that they are motivated. They try to drive them in the same way. They want to mold those that they coach in their image. (In my opinion a good example of this is Mike Singletary at the San Francisco 49ers.) This approach can actually destroy the competitor and the team. A similar problem is a coach that coaches for the team (and talent) he would like to have rather than the team (and talent) he does have.
Those that compete are individuals. A good coach finds out how to drive and motivate the individual and how to work that individuals personality towards success. He takes the talent he has on his team and designs a game plan to maximize the talent and compensate for the weakness. Most good coaches struggled at what they coach (at least at some point) and had to become real students of the sport and the people around them to have any success; they did not dominate - the hung on with cunning and determination. (Tony LaRussa was a marginal player before becoming a great manager.)
I have coached some for my kids. I was not a good coach, but a lot of this has more to do with me lacking basic skills and an ability to teach them in some of these sports. I think I have been a good Royal Rangers Commander; but I had to learn I could not help all the kids. I had to find the ones that wanted to be there or that I could show them the value of being there.
However, as a father I am my sons coach. I understand them (or at least try) and need to learn to motivate each one based on who he is as an individual. If there is one thing I have learned with 6 boys is that they are all different. Each one needs help in different areas. As a father I need to figure out to reach each one and get them to do the best they can do. In many ways this is more important than the ability to teach the actual skill. There are lots of people that can teach the actual skills, but it is really hard to find a way to motivate them to take the skills and be the best they can be.
I think this is true of coaches in Real Estate and Life in general too, be it a boss, mentor, or a coach.
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